My Favorite Things 2010!!

I know 2010 is not over yet and I sure hope I get some more amazing things for Christmas to share with you (Wonderman, are you reading? More important do you need any ideas or hints??? Ask Babygirl....she knows!!) But, I'll have plenty of time in 2011 to share all that with you...right now I feel the need to to make a list. You know I'd LOVE to give stuff to you but - wait!!! I have an idea...I will give the first person that reads this blog and let's me know - something from my list of favorite things!!! Everybody loves a contest and I love hearing that you read my blog. Now, as usual this list will be all over the place in no particular order...that's how I roll. And since I love a bargain you can go buy most of it yourself!!Drumroll please...

1. Parties!! Any kind - once I get there. I can be a bit of a hermit and sometimes in order to get me out of my house the host has to allow me to come comfy - slippers and sweats with makeup and joolry!! Just cause I like comfy doesn't mean barefaced and drab!! Speaking of joolry - Chicos has some really great stuff...

2. Any excuse to decorate!!! Tie between Christmas and Halloween. Some of my fav Christmas ornaments are the really cheap glitter ones. Glitter makes a real mess but Good Lord is it pretty on a tree!!! Walmart has some amazing ones for $1!!! Hello!! That is easier than spraying glitter on pasta shells but go ahead if you are feeling crafty.

3. Glee...Great gift idea!! If you can find someone that hasn't been watching already. I really like the last CD that just came out too. So much that I ordered the first season vol. 1 & 2 cd's from Walmart. Save your money. They are not so great but the latest one from season two and the Christmas CD are awesome!!

4. Girl tricks stuff: Sally Hansen Insta-dri nail polish!! Easy to use and it stays as long as salon stuff does. Yes, I miss the hand and arm massage but if I do my nails myself a couple of times that pays for a whole body massage...which is another of my favorite things. Covertox face powder by Physicians Formula is awesome - blogged about it already so go read up on it...face primers - two I've tried are Covergirl Serum Primer and L'Oreal Studio Secrets...great around the eyes and anywhere you are "starting" to look crepey...if they'd only make this for the body!!

5. Two favorite books - City of Thieves by David Benioff and Stupid and Contagious by Caprice Crane. Totally different but loved them both. City of Thieves is a book I'd recommend to ANYONE and I laughed so much reading Stupid and Contagious that everyone around me at the infusion center wanted to know what I was reading...if a book can make you laugh out loud when your husband is going thru chemo trust me it is worth reading.

6. Target - we could be here all day. I LOVE this store which I am going to rename My HAPPY PLACE. I can buy books, boots (got a GREAT pair and saved a boat load of money when I returned a pair to MACY's...) clothes and groceries in ONE STORE!!! See I figure up all the gas money I'd spend driving all over and that helps with the BOATLOAD of money I spend in Target. Hopefully, Wonderman stopped reading earlier and is shopping with Babygirl for my Christmas surprises. Prolly at Target!! They love it too. I also just got the best bra ever there!! I've been telling ya forever to save your money on your undies and shop here for all of it!! My new fav is the NEW! SELF expressions i-fit bra...so comfy I could sleep in it. What I call Soap Opera Sex...have you watched daytime tv lately??? Lots of pretty bras and pretty people having lots of sex.

7. I could write a whole blog on lipstick and gloss but you'd prolly stop reading. Here are my two tips - forget about lip liner unless you are using it to fill in your whole lip and put chap stick on top. Just lining your lips looks silly when the lipstick wears off and slightly scary when it doesn't. The girls at the makeup counter love for you to buy it cause it boosts their sale. Even when I was a makeup girl I never suggested liner. Tip #2 - if you are over 25 you will look 15yrs. younger if you lighten up your color!!! I know big dark red lips are in style on young starlets, models and people that have been airbrushed. But, unless you are being airbrushed go lighter. If you like red soften it with a little gloss. Better yet, go with gloss. Not all are sticky and gooey so find one you like and remember everyone looks younger when they are smiling!!!

8. Words with Friends - love it when I am bombing someone with a big ole word...hate it when I have either all vowels or all consonants and no big word to play.

9. Facebook - LOVE keeping in touch with friends from the past and family far away...

10. Sleepy puppies!!

Hate to stop here but the boys are home and begging for food. AGAIN.

Holidaze!!!

Okay, we went HOME for Thanksgiving - which means flight from Dallas to Atlanta, drive to Lexington, S.C. then drive to Atlanta and flight to Dallas...and it ALL was so easy and amazing!!All the security hype had me a little nervous. Dallas to Atlanta was a non event. Love our airport!! Wonderman and I had a Fabulous day in our native city on Wednesday - due to family traditions the Grans take our kids to S.C. on Wednesday and John and I drive up on Thanksgiving Day...lunch at Antico Pizza Napoletana started us off. He read about it in a mag...Atlanta Best New Restaurants. While service lacked a little on the friendly ( WE are BIG on friendly :))) They made up for it on the most amazing pizza We HAVE EVER HAD..ANYWHERE!!! Can NOT rave enough about this place and the food. Just take your own wine/beer. See even totally, sadly sober we LOVED THIS PLACE!! I'm just saying. And if that wasn't enough, that night we went with our Uncle Fab Ted to Miller Union. Stop reading now and jjjjust go book your reservations for these two places and GO EAT IF YOU ARE LUCKY ENOUGH TO LIVE IN ATLANTA!! Or close enough to drive!! If you love pizza You will love Antico and if you love southern cooking with a Posh British accent you will love Miller Union...We did!!! Then on to Lexington for family and food and fun!! We had it all!! Catch Phrase is a blast!! Play it and give it for Christmas...To Aunt Sherril - we are so glad you are here and inspiring us all to work out and be the best we can be!! Cindy - you are the most amazing hostess!! The Grans & Ted for making Atlanta the home we remember and miss!To John and my kids for just being you and making my everday a special holiday - I love you all!!

Strangest Night of my life...

Ya'll know I am usually about the good and funny here...but, tonight was kinda strange. It all started in the driveway...son going to lacrosse practice which is normal - I'm riding shotgun there and bringing his truck home, cause next week is his sixteenth birthday and then Mom's Taxi Service is over...keyword driveway - then girl screaming (me) due to snake in the driveway. Anaconda in my eyes as all snakes are. Lots of drama - Dad tosses snake into yard, saves the night, I drive son to practice, blah blah blah. Get back home - freakin out about gigantic reptile in yard and decide grilled chicken is yummy in oven too. Can't face possible outdoor critters again alone. Hubs is now at tennis courts and I am all alone.

So to recover and ignore all laundry, I decide to open wine and catch up on girl shows...love my direct tv. On multiple tvs inhouse....so I start with Private Practice...THE EPISODE where one of my favorite tv characters is brutually attacked. Last season I watched another fav girl on this show answer her doorbell to crazy patient who then cut her child out of her BELLY and left us hanging until this season. If I didn't like this show so much I think I could find one less upsetting. One bottle of wine later - give me a break, I've had a really rough night!!! - the strongest, bravest, out there woman on tv is lying about the fact that some asshole brutally raped her. Putting her friends in a bad place pretending they don't know what really happened. While her great, but whussy husband, wigs out cause he didn't protect her. AND he doesnt even admit he knows she was raped. Hint to all guys - we love our stuff and bags but if some asshole wants to steal it, we will give it up. True, I'd fight for my cell phone (pics hello!!) but my wallet???? Wedding rings? OKAY, All bets off. Still, very gut ripping tv. Then that ended with no real solution yet, and I thought what did that just teach young girls??? You are brutally violated without cause and YOU feel shame and cover it up??? Hope the show fixes this. Not what I want my daughter to feel if ever in this spot. My girl better nail the bastard. And you can only do this by standing up for yourself and telling what happened.

After this happy hour, I decided to watch Saturday Night Live...just happened to have the episode with Rihanna and I'm sorry but the song just broke my heart...dont even know the real name just the words "Oh, Nana what's my name" made me sad.. really hope it wasn't something else but she just seemed lost. We all know what she went thru with Chris Brown. When and how do our girls learn this is never, NEVER okay? If you are a doctor, singer, mother, sister or prostitute? THIS is never okay!!

Then, desperate for something better I watched Robin Roberts special with Leanne Rhymes - OMG!! Get she had it hard being a successful child star and all but, please does that make it okay to cheat on your husband and steal another woman's husband??? Is he really that much of a catch??? Don't think so!!Just once, I want to hear someone like her or Tiger say, " I couldn't help myself! I know in my heart this was wrong and that it would hurt other people - but, couldn't stop cause I am a selfish bastard/whore and you know what? DIDN'T CARE - DID IT ANYWAY!!" Then, I just might believe them when they realize and say, "OMG - I really did just cause all this pain in so many lives." No one wants to admit they did anything wrong...even when they didn't. Charlotte did not deserve what happened to her on Private Practice. Neither did Rihanna. As for LeAnne, well - just admit you couldn't help yourself. But, don't cry victim. Say, "I am human and I am sorry." I know none of us are perfect and we all make mistakes. Sometimes we do everything right and life still turns out wrong. Life is hard and wonderful. Just stand up for yourself when you are right and stand up and admit when you are wrong. That's all...

The men in our lives should care if they can't be there to protect us. They should never ever be the ones hitting or hurting us. And if they do - WE SHOULD NEVER ACCEPT IT...OR COVER IT UP!!!

Wiggin Out

I am wiggin out!! It's the beginning of my favortie time of the year - Halloween has come and gone. Which means it is practically New Years already!!! Don't blink cause Thanksgiving is here and the big one will be nothing but scraps of ribbon and pretty paper before we know it. That is why I call this my WIGGIN OUT time...I am a nonstop decorating fool from the last day in September (Halloween goes up) til sometime in February, I've been known to throw a couples Cupid party and that is a whole other blog. I've already warned my houseboys (Wonderman and Gman) that I would truly appreciate their muscles this afternoon bringing down the Christmas Sparkly Crap. All of it. Got to get it up and ready due to a few little trips this month. Since we hit the Thanksgiving Jackpot (someone else will be slaving over this meal - can't wait!!) I can go ahead and get the inside all ready for Santa. I will hold off on outside of house to keep the homeowners association happy. That will all go up last day of November.

Back to Halloween - my personal fav holiday - and wigging out. Here is another shameless shout out to WENDY WILLIAMS - love you and love your show!!! If I have to be anywhere before noon I just have to leave the tv off cause her show is so fun to watch I can't stop and then I'm late for anything before 1:00. I am the master of piddling away the time in the morning. Anyway, I love WW and all her fabulous wigs. So for Halloween this year my costume came second to the wig I wanted to wear. Had my heart fixed on a Sookie wig (Have never ever watched that show and don't plan to cause I am already addicted to enough car wreck tv - you know you shouldn't look but you can't help it and once you look/watch it you can't stop) but all the good ones where gone so I had to make do with a Amy Whinehouse wig. Now every year I go all crazy with the Halloween decorations inside and outside. I know I have a problem but it isn't hurting anyone and my family secretly loves me for it. This year I made sure we got a Halloween Costume Party on the calendar. Want to every year and before I can send out evites it is freakin Christmas. So we had a Paparazzi Celebrity Costume Party - come as your favorite celebrity...person or character. They could be sports, tv or movies or just someone in the news. Lots of possibilities and something for everyone. The crazies like me that love a good laugh and costume and the shy ones that prefer to just come laugh at everyone else all dressed up. Told them not to worry they could show up dressed normal and we would call them contestants on Wife Swap.

Back to wigs...Snooki was obviously going to be a big costume this year so I decided it would be more fun and age appropriate for me to dress up as Snooki's mother and of course Wonderman would be Snooki's dad...he got to wear a great Situation costume with a wig like Pauly (the other boy duffus on the the show). As the Dad he can mix it up...we had so much fun and we had two Snookies and several Situations in the house. The scene stealers were Amy Winehouse and Slash,Ozzy and Sharon Osbourne,Hannah Montana and Billy Ray, and Kat and Jesse James. Talk about great wigs!!! Who knew they could be so much fun!! Wendy Williams that's who. And Raquel Welch and most of the men on soap operas!! Trust me the boys are not all genetically blessed with amazing hair over 35...they are rocking some man hair wigs. And why not? Not fair for us to get the special effects tricks of make up AND great hair all to ourselves. So on that note it is time for me to stop rambling and get to the Good Stuff!!! Here are my latest and greatest favorite things that I wish I could give you like Oprah and Wendy do. One day when I am rich and famous I will make that my life mission...while others are feeding the hungry, adopting all the orphan children, and saving our canine friends - I'll be giving away all my fav good stuff!!! Spread the word about a great mascara and the world will be better for all.

Been awhile and I'm overloaded with stuff to share...will keep it to face stuff today:

My biggest problems are age spots and patchy dry skin that will not stop peeling. After weeks of trying lots of moisturizers I finally scheduled a derm appt. for next week. Which I don't even need now due to the brilliant idea I had to try an old faithful standby...

Pond's Dry Skin Cream. I love the cucumber cleansing cream and accidentally bought the dry skin cream by mistake one day. Noticed it in the cabinet sitting unused and thought worth a try. Dry patchy skin is GONE....then I started using it on my neck and dry crepe wrinkly skin looks instantly better!!! I am going to start buying this stuff by the vat. Will post if I find it supersized somewhere - good news is it is cheap anyway.

The other miracle product is Clinique Even Better Dark Spot Corrector. I would love to get a fancy laser treatment but since I am chicken and cheap that prolly won't be happening. Next best thing with no pain and a lot better price is waiting for you at the Clinique counter and it made a huge difference in just two weeks. I really couldn't believe it.

I also love Clinique's new Redness Solutions makeup. There is a great little sample of it in the latest magazines. I just dot it on where needed to cover any redness, veins and my much lighter age spots.

I am also a big fan of Revlon's Age Defying Face Illuminator. I use the Bare Light shade to just give a subtle glow and it really does make your pores disappear. It is great around eyes too to help concealer cover dark circles.

Now my next fav thing caught my eye one day and after I stopped laughing at the ridiculous claims on the packaging I decided to buy it and try it and then return it. No way it could work. It is Physicians Formula CoverToxTen Wrinkle Therapy Face Powder. Stop laughing and listen. Yes, it actually claims to reduce over 50% visible wrinkles in 10 MINUTES all the way up to 90% visibly smoother skin in JUST 10 DAYS!! After you stop snickering run as fast as you can to CVS drugstore and snatch it up. Once this secret stuff gets out it will fly off the shelves. I was shocked and knew I had hit facial jackpot when Wonderman took one look noticed something different and panicked thinking I'd had "some work done"...seriously, who's laughing now???

And my final face secret weapon is Stila Illuminating Finishing powder in Gold.It just gives a little glow to keep your face from looking to flat and matte. Just brush it lightly over cheekbones and nose.

Now some of you may be thinking "That's a lot of face crap...no wonder she can't get out of the house before 1:00!!" Not true...I honestly do all this in ten minutes and that includes eyes, blush and lips. Maybe 15 -20 if WW is on and I'm distracted watching her show. It is the time I spend blowing out my hair that eats up my morning which is why I think I might start rocking my Amy Winehouse wig year round. What I really want is the wig my friend Sharon Osbourne wore to my party!! Time for me to WIG OUT for real!!! And a big hug and kiss to my unpaid much loved personal publicist - Mrs. Bedgood (real name too!!) for telling everyone to read my blog and helping me share the GOODSTUFF!!!

It Gets Better

I had so many great things to share tonight cause it has been awhile. I had amazing new beauty stuff (and you know we all need that) delicious recipes (okay, we prolly didn't need those but dang they are good) and don't even get me started on the books, tv and movies you just have to see can't live without....but, before I started on this I got sucked into that black hole of time I love to call Facebook...and no, I have not seen the movie yet but I can't wait!! JUST too busy on FACEBOOK to go see the MOVIE ABOUT FACEBOOK...that might be a problem for them, ya think? All us FB addicts can't go see the movie cause we are home on FB. Just a thought.

But, FB has lots of really good things happening too. Not just Betty White's career boost. She is AMAZING an prolly was gonna ride this wave all on her on. But, FB did get her on SNL. And, my original FB post tonight was about how great SNL was last Saturday with Sue Sylvester...LOVE HER LOVE AND THE SHOW GLEE...but, again that is not what I am writing about now. Now that I watched something my friend Robert from high school in the small southern town of Thomaston, Georgia shared on Facebook.

I don't think he will mind me sharing with you that he is gay. He is also several years younger than me but I knew him in high school because his oldest brother was in my class. There was also a middle brother and all three were without a doubt the cutest things ever. All the girls were crazy about them. That is how I remember them. Loved them then and love them now. Two youngest are more flattered by attention from the opposite sex. That is silly southern for gay. I don't care -you shouldn't - just means they are awesome. Robert shared this video on Facebook today and it really is a wake up call for ALL of us. I am soooo proud to say an amazing man from my new adopted home state of Texas shared something so personal and brave with all of us. I just hope those of us that need to hear it most - do.

Do listen and honestly, take a moment to think about your kids, your family, your friends...does it really matter who they want to love and marry based on sexual preferences??? If their choice is a good person that loves them back, does it matter if they are the same size, race, or sexual orientation? Is it worth children killing themselves, starving themselves or living alone? If Jesus loves us all, shouldn't that cover everything? I may not be in "church" every Sunday, but I do believe in God. I do believe he made us all. I do believe he is ready for all of us to trust him and that. If he made it, all we need to do is respect it all. ALL. Not just what looks like us. We are all human and flawed and He loves us still. Watch the video - just google Joel Burns It Gets Better...it should be there. Grab a box of tissues first and open your heart and MIND. You just might help us save ourselves...or at least our children.

True Blahhhhh

Well that sucked...and sometimes sucking is not a good thing. Ya'll know I'm all about my vampires. Books, tv and yes even those annoying to some but loved by most - vampire movies. Why? Good question. I have decided I am partial to handsome vampires. So that rules out all of Anne Rice's boys/girls. They are just brutal and mean. At least as far as I got in her series. Not far. I even tried the artsy one Let the Right One In...or something like that and well call me a whimp but - yuck. Didn't finish and won't go see the new movie out either. Creepy little girl bloodsuckers just have zero appeal for me. Now, a hot guy with serious issues and reasons why it shouldn't work with the troubled female, blah, blah and blah...yea I'm all over that. Make him hot, bad, sarcastic, and crazy too - even better. Throw in a really hot and troubled but good guy brother and you have Vampire Diaries. Hands/vangs down the best vampire thing going. If you are not watching - DO - go buy the first season. I promise you will love it. PROMISE. If you don't, well you prolly won't like my blog either. So just stop reading now and have a nice boring life.

For everyone else...don't bother reading the book series of Vampire Diaries - kind of dull after watching the show which does not follow the books. If you want to read a series that is wayyyy better than the show then read Charlaine Harris's Sookie Stackhouse series...just go to Amazon and start at the beginning. The show has been alot of fun but the books are so much better. As you can tell by my title I thought the season finale was kind of blah. As in True Blah.

True Blood has so many things going for it. It just has a bad habit of killing them off. Like the crazy funny boyfriend of the King of Louisiana. Good plot line but dang he was sooooo fun to watch. Hate that. And the KING!!! Please don't kill him...or Eric...and for God's sake don't screw it all up by killing off Pam. She is awesome!!! Kill Soukie before ya kill off Pam. Seriously. Now I've read all the books and the show is not following them for the most part. Some good some bad. But, keep watching. It's worth it.

The End of Summer 2010

Tonight is the night for my family....I know our friends in Georgia have been back to school for about three weeks. Wow, that really sucks for you. Tomorrow morning will really suck for us. You have adjusted and are prolly in your groove right now. We will lay awake tonight thinking about tomorrow and stressing cause we are still awake. Until about 28 minutes before this really LOUD SHRILL NOISE wakes us up. And trust me those 28 minutes will feel like the best sleep we've had all summer. Even though at some point during them we will be dreaming about showing up the first day without any pencils and naked. Again, this will suck for us. You've already recovered and realizied the wisdom of going to bed before 1:30am and that you were just dreaming bout the pencils and lack of clothes. We will feel like zombies for the next week or so. Then we will be so overwhelmed by the projects due and tests to study for, that it will be Christmas before we know it. And before we can unwrap the presents it will be summer 2011. It's no joke that time is flying. You know you are old as dirt when your kids get that too. When they start complaining about how fast time is going - then you know you might need to be making some final plans.

The only thing saving me from feeling my real age (besides the wrinkles and rolls and crap that is happening to my body - and the number of times I've heard "Mam" lately) is that my baby is not yet 16. Time is dragging for him until 11/14/2010...The DAY he will turn 16. Then I will also age another 100 yrs. INSTANTLY. Even though I know how fast the year flies by once September gets here it will drag for him and hopefully for me. As much as I am enjoying watching my children grow up and mature - it is scary to know that they are not the only ones growing older. Happens to us all. Our friends, pets, parents and yes, that face we see everyday in the mirror.

So to all my dear McKinney friends getting ready for the first day of school tomorrow - whether it's kindergarten or 6th grade or sophmore year of high school/college...time is flying by for all of us, kiss and hug your loved ones and send them on their way tomorrow. And for those of us with kids away at school, send them a text! Thank god for texting and facebook - it almost feels like they are still home. And for those of you with kids off to college for their freshman year - don't forget to "take" your family Christmas card picture by Thanksgiving break. I learned the hard way last year that it is really hard to get a good one on 12/17. Even harder to get it developed and in the mail by 12/25....just a thought.

Denial

Let's start with Denial...I am not really ready for summer to be over. So we are just pretending that this is not the last Wednesday of summer '2010....that would make me sad. Right now, I am still giggling from watching the first episode of Weeds Season Six. This is even more fun cause I just watched it on this really cool website - hulu.com. Now stop laughing. I KNEW about Hulu. This was just the first time I actually sat down and watched something on it. AWESOME. If you don't mind them bleeping some of those creative words (except for bitch - funny that, kinda made me mad that was okay but other creative choices weren't. Sexist, I say.) Otherwise it rocks to watch shows on Showtime. We pay for HBO but not Showtime. So excited about watching stuff on Hulu!!! Due to major power outage and transformer blowing in my side yard and hot cute firemen coming on the night of Desperate Housewives season finale last spring, I missed the last show and that is why I tried to find it on Hulu. That episode won't be available till the end of August but I can wait a few more weeks. AND watch Weeds!!!LOVING THAT!!! Almost makes up for it being the end to summer.

Back to Weeds - please tell me you have been watching!!! If not - run to Blockbuster and get started. Warning - YOU will become addicted. I am pretty sure there is crack in it. Cause one show and you are hooked for life. It is just a touch racy so you might not want to view with anyone from your church. Nancy Botwin is my hero. Not because she deals pot to save and support her family. That is just wrong - and I along with Bill have never inhaled anything. Funny if you knew me - that this would be one of my favorite shows. I love her because she always does whatever she needs to do to take care of her family....and WHATEVER just doesn't even begin to cover it. Plus, she is just so cool about it all. True role model.

Won't give away any major plot secrets but, will say I loved seeing all the Vera Bradley piled in her car as she was fleeing off to her next adventure. For those of you that think Vera isn't cool - HA!!! If it's good enough for Nancy B. it is good enough for me...yes, all that Vera Bradley gave me a good giggle. Can't wait to tell Babygirl about it. She might have walked in during a few episodes over the years so she will giggle too. We also are huge Vera Bradley fans. I'm guessing she has provided pretty well for her family too.

As for providing for families - tonight we are having our favorite Chicken Marsala w/ Marscarpone. John will be teaching Tyler how to make it since she will have an apartment with kitchen this year at school. Griffin already knows how and he will be joining us after lax practice. We are under strict orders not to eat it all. I did all the shopping and prep work and will be supervising from a safe spot with a glass of wine...the fact that it is almost 8:00 and we haven't even started yet tells me that it is still summertime. Got to love that! Back to Denial...and Hulu. Monday morning will be here before we know it, but for now....STILL SUMMER 2010!!! Enjoy!!

A Toast to July

All good things must come to an end and so it is with Birthday Month...HBD to two friends that share today and the end of the month. Although, if someone calls and insists, I am always willing to continue my celebrations into the next month. Us summer babies are adaptable that way. Have to be when your entire friend base is all busy with summer vacations and what else. I've had a fabulous BD Month with TWO trips to Atlanta - both were quick so if I missed you don't think it was on purpose -these trips were fast and tight on schedule!! Reunions with John's high school friends (30 yrs - dang my boy toy is OLD) and my cousins that have reconnected on facebook/the blackhole of my life....now just kidding, I LOVE facebook. THAT is the problem. I have to force myself to remember I have a life and it is flashing by while I sit reading about everyone else's!!! How cool is this!! Next to Words with Friends on my iphone it is a miracle that I remember to eat. I wish. Somehow I always manage to not forget to do that.

The last day of July is always sad for me and not just cause I loove my BD month but because it usually means it is almost time to go back to school. And the part of that I really hate is that it is not okay to be serving dinner around 9:00. Unless you live in Europe. They eat really late and that is about time to start the appetizers. I'm pretty sure in America I could be arrested for being a crap mom by keeping my children hungry until then.But since I let them sleep til about 1:30 I figure they shouldn't be that hungry....

Here are some Things that made the list of Good Stuff this month:

1. Time with family and friends!! Here, Atlanta, Hawaii ( I know!!),the tennis court,on facebook, my backyard or yours it doesn't' really matter where. It is always who you are with. To all I was with this month it has been fabulous. Even in a hospital room with a dear friend from Arlington, it is all good. Make the most of every minute with all your favorite people. Time is flying by.

2. Homebody that I am - of course, I'm going to talk about tv shows. A couple of new favorites you shouldn't miss are : The Good Guys - OMG, non stop laughs and two cop characters to rival Andy and Barney in the hall of fame of cops!! Memphis - which is another cop show set in duh, Memphis and who knew Jason Lee was smokin hot rockin an Elvis do (that is a talent all on it's on) and he can freakin sing. Least, I think it is him - keep meaning to Google that and check it out cause he is really good!!!. And the last cop show is The Glades - very catchy and fun. Who knew cops were so hot and funny!! Last time we got pulled over I'm thinking not so much!! Actually, I did have some really hot cops one time and they were all on motorcycles...seriously, this really happened and my kids were in the car an will back me up. THank God it was not my fault and prolly why this is a fond memory for me....which reminds me I need to pay Wonderman's ticket for running a red. He's been a bad bad boy...

3. This one deserves a paragraph all to it's self....GLEE!! I told them they would LOVE IT AND IT TOOK A BIRTHDAY DEMAND TO GET THEM ALL HOOKED!!! Gman is still holding out but he watched it that night. Wonderman is a GONER. He actually got his MAN CARD pulled the next day at work when he tried to share with everyone how great it was. That is one of the many reasons why I LOVE HIM!!! He even took it on our road trip to Hotlanta to watch it in the car....and Tyler and Cory are addicted now and dying to get the second season!!! YES, I TOLD YOU FREAKIN SO!!!!! GREAT SHOW!!! Sorry, I know that was obnoxious but you have no idea how hard it was for me to get them to just try it!!!

4. I have lots of girl stuff to report on but, I am exhausted already and the pups are dying to get out of laundry room and run around pooing an peeing everywhere so I better wrap this up tonight...so come back next time for some good product scoop and why I think I am a Mascara Slut. That should cause some interesting Google ads...have you noticed my ads -which I have nothing to do with other than whatever I blog about causes them to pop up....the whole vibrating mascara blog really got some "interesting" ones!!! And I've found the PERFECT BATHING SUIT for everybody and I mean everybody rocks this one!! It is so amazing - I will even post a picture of me in it...if I can figure out how to post pictures. Next time!!!

Best Birthday EVER

In case you are just coming to the partay, here is something you may not know about me....I LOVE BIRTHDAYS!!! How could you not??? It is your day and it is okay to expect it to all be about YOU! If you go around acting like this on any other day you will just tick everyone off and they will prolly gossip behind your back about what a total pinhead you are...So here are my favorite things about birthdays - mine and yours - I love them all so by all means if it is your special day I want to know about it too and help you celebrate it. If there is cake involved I am so there. If there is cake and party liquids - even better!!!

FAVORITE REASONS TO SHOUT OUT IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY!!!

1. Obviously to force everyone that loves you into being your own personal slave for the day. ALL about you people and it starts with breakfast. EAT whatever you want and if you can get them to make it, bring it and clean it up - wow. You don't need me for this you are on track all by yourself. My breakfast of choice was an amazing cupcake made from scratch by my precious Babygirly (new name but she is still The most amazing college student home for the summer but that name is waaay too long)and yes, we will pass along the recipe cause that is how we roll. We share all. Here is a cupcake tease so come back for the recipe blog...chocolate, coffee, coconut and granache, marshmellow...heaven!!! Breakfast of champions!!

2. birthday cards!!! OMG - I love cards...already told you I am the crazy lady standing in the isle laughing outloud - sometimes I buy the really funny ones just for me...keep a stash and just read them whenever I am sad/sober and need a little funny. Got some really funny ones this year from my awesome in laws!!!

3. FaceBook Birthdays!! If you are one of the two people on the planet still not on FB - shut up and just sign up. Even if you are a complete computer nincompoop it is worth it for the birthday love alone!!! Yes, it was the highlight of my day to check all day long and see who was sending me a HBD message!!! It was my own personal Sally Field Oscar moment - "You love me, you REALLY love me!!" So to all my FB friends for life - "Thank you for all the love and for taking the time to be a part of my day!!!" - This is especially great for those of us that have summer birthdays when all your friends are on vacay and not around to help you celebrate...elementary days totally sucked too cause you never really got to have your mom lug in 28 frosted cupcakes on YOUR day to share with your whole class...yes, that scarred me for life. Now some teachers tried to make up for it by having a day for all the summer birthdays at either the beginning or end of the year but we all knew that was lame. Christmas BDays prolly suck too. Kind of gets lost in all the green and red wrapping paper and who wants to compete with Jesus.

4. Birthday lunches...what are friends for!!! To take you out to lunch and celebrate!!This is a win win for all...perfect reason to ditch the office/housework/kids and go hangout with your friends in the middle of the day!! Take a little refresher nap and you will be ready to celebrate with birthday dinner.

5. Birthday plans...mine was genious this year. I'd been trying for months to get my stubborn family to watch my new fav show on demand. As in I demand they watch it too. For some silly reason they were not cooperating and this makes me crazy. Until, I realizied that they HAVE to do what I want on my BD!!! When I told them we would be eating in (pizza on grill - directions on earlier blog) and all watching something in the media room they started to sweat and worry. OMG the whining and beggin and worrying about "WHAT are we going to have to sit thru???" When I finally told them "just one episode" the lightbulb went on and they guessed it and groaned and complained but laughed and knew I HAD THEM cause it's my birthday!!! Ha!!

Yes, we all boyfriend son included watched the one episode of Glee that I knew would get them all hooked - Glee is like crack you can't just watch one episode - The Beyonce one where Kirk joins the football team!!! OMG - even Wonderman was laughing OUTLOUD!!! A lot!!! This is truly huge cause he is one of those people that can watch Modern Family and I can't tell if he is awake or not cause he doesn't laugh out loud!!! Yes, Opposites attract - I take personal pride in laughing the loudest. And I think lots of stuff is funny. Pulp Fiction cracked me up!! Back to Glee - I lost count of how many episodes we watched last night!! Best Birthday Ever!!!

Birthday Week

This is the BIG ONE... Who am I kidding? The family is all freakin out about the big one...But, seriously, even though I am the little girl that cried WOLF for the last five years this time I mean it....On Wednesday, July 14th, 2010 I will turn my last time at 40 SOMETHING!!! Pause and give this moment the respect it deserves...THANK YOU. Now, give me a moment to stop crying and shamelessly milking it for all it is fucking worth....HONESTLY PEOPLE, SHOW SOME F'ING RESPECT FOR YOUR FREAKIN ELDERS -PLEASE. THINK I'VE EARNED IT NOW!!!

Liquid diets and all aside, this is truly the big one leading up to next year - when you will all really need to be here to celebrate with me and keep me from bodily harm....as I eat lots of cake. Got this year covered and it is just going to be really good for me. Told the family tonight to clear Wednesday and Friday nights for me....Wednesday is a secret (will blog later) and Friday we will all be at Gold Coast Cinemas to see Inception - hope Leo doesn't disappoint!!

Wonderman covered all his bases two months ago in Vegas with a nice ring to celebrate our anniversary and my birthday - love him!!! And, he sent me happily to Hawaii for a girlfriend get away this past week so I am coasting into birthday week with no complaints and feeling fine!! They are all freakin out over the secret Wednesday night parteyyy...trust me they will love it!! KNOW I will...and I'll share later.

So, no matter who is celebrating their birthday - to all of us celebrating another year - to us!! Wear it well!! Cheers!!

11 hours and 5 minutes...

In case you missed the most amazing tennis match in history...A six foot nine tennis god from UGA defeated another tennis god from France in an 11 hour and five minute match during first rounds at Wimbleton...whether you are a tennis fan or not - can you think of anything you'd want to do for that long??? Sleep maybe. But, after that I don't know...that is a freakin long time and it was hot and humid and neither one ever gave up. I was starting to think they just might be there for ever. There are lots of things I love to do but I don't think I could or would want to do most of them for that long. I couldn't even shop that long and - wow - that is shocking!! I love to read but I don't think I could even do that for 11 hours. I might could enjoy non stop movies at Gold Class Cinemas for that long - if bathroom breaks were included and I guess the tennis gods did get those. Don't forget the little button and movie slaves just waiting to make you happy....

Speaking of happy - I took Baby Girl/The world's Best College Student that is home for the Summer - to get our special occasion mani/pedi treat today. First of all, I am always shocked at how much this costs!! How does anyone do this every other week??? We stretch ours out for about two months. Maybe they are charging us more cause our feets are all grody. Who knows. I can paint my own but I just go for the foot sex. I mean massage. Is it just me - or do you ever feel like you are getting a little more than what you thought you were paying for??? This is not the first time I have kind of worried I might be a foot massage slut. Bingo - NOW I KNOW WHAT I COULD DO FOR ELEVEN HOURS AND FIVE MINUTES!!!! I could sit back and let someone rub my feet!!! OMG!! That is it!!! Screw tennis - just rub my feet!! I love that line from some movie or cartoon - can't remember where it comes from - "...come rub Sugar Mama's feet!" I LOVE that!! Everyone at my house just freaks and runs out of the room when I say it. Hate that. But, go to your local nail salon and for 15-20 minutes...heaven on earth. Now, I absolutely HATE the rest of it. The clipping and scraping and all that. JUST RUB MY FEET!!! Now that would be a wonderful 11 hrs & 5 minutes.

Adult Movie Heaven

I have died and gone to Adult Movie Heaven....now that I have your attention - not necessarily THAT kind of movie just that kind of Movie PLACE...for grown ups!!! I'm talking about Gold Class Cinemas. Wonderman had a great idea today when he got home from golfing in 102 degree heat...I thought he'd be jumping straight into the pool but NOOOOO. He wanted to go see a movie in AIR CONDITIONING. Since I'd been floatin all day anyway this seemed like a good idea to me too. Somehow we ended up at the Gold Class Cinemas and let me just tell you - worth EVERY penny more. I am talking top of the line movie experience. From our little wait in the lobby/nightclub to the amazing movie seats themselves!!! OMG talk about heaven - so comfy and they recline. And like pool service on vacay you have a little button you push and the cutest movie slaves come running to bring you whatever you want...Did I mention the wine and beer list??? You name it they have it cold and most on TAP and all you do is push a button and they come very quickly and quietly to wait on you!!!Now, I've already mentioned it was freakin hot outside today and let me tell you it was meatlocker cold in there too...no worries!! Just push the button and you have a blanket and PILLOW!!! I KNOW!!! Too cool!!

The food looked amazing but I already had everything marinating at home for a big ole cookout so we just had the gourmet cheese popcorn and it wasn't that much more than regular movie popcorn but it was so delicious. Bout half way thru the movie all I could think about was the chocolate, carmel marshmellow popcorn so I just pushed that magic button and poof there was my movie slave with the best popcorn ever and another round of beers for the two happiest movie goers on the planet. Now, if you know me - I like to stay home and watch movies in my own home movie theater and yes, we have those amazing reclining seats and I can eat my favorite stinky popcorn (parmesean cheese and cumin with a touch of garlic salt) and I have beverages of the adult variety too. I just do not have the magic button and movie slaves bringing me stuff!!!Not to mention real food if I want it and let me tell you - I want it and can't wait to go back and see another movie and eat dinner there too!!! As a matter of fact Wonderman and I are planning to just vacay there instead of flying anywhere this summer!! Just think no security hassles or extra baggage fees!!! See ya at the movies!! Oh, and go see Toy Story - just take some tissues if you are sending someone off to college this summer!!

The Good Stuff

It has been awhile since I shared the good stuff...I don't even know where to begin. It is officially summertime. That is always GOOD STUFF. I love summer more than any kid and that is saying alot. Everyday feels like a vacation day to me. Silly cause I haven't had a real nine to five job in many years but there is just still something about summer that feels like the best days ever. I still do the stuff I do all year long but summer makes it better. So here are a few of my favorite things and this will be all over the place.

Glee - OMG...I am late to this party but I am catching up!! I own but have not watched the first season. Started watching the week of Madonna and haven't stopped since. What an amazing show!!! Forget American Idol...if you want to watch amazing kids sing and enjoy an even better story with great lines...then just try this show!!! Between this and Friday Night Lights - high school rocks!! Two totally different shows but still!! Great TV.

Also just watched The Good Guys....loved it!!Filmed in Dallas, Collin Hanks (Tom's son) and Bradley Whitford are hilarious!! And Drop Dead Diva is back on LOVE THAT!!

Just saw Killers and it was GREAT!! Go see this movie!! Screw the critics and while you are there go see Sex in the City Two!! I am shocked by all the bad press...Great chick flick!! And bite me all critics blasting this movie... It is SUPPOSED to be over the top. GET a LiFE people...do we really want to see the girls wearing clothes from the Gap/Old NAVY and going to the beach in Florida????NEW FREAKIN JERSEY??? THAT would be a Situation. And no I refuse to watch that show. I am not even watching the Housewives ANYWHERE anymore. Why??? I just can't stand to watch women BASH each other. So not cool. It is time for Women/Girls EVERYWHERE to lift each other up and make the world a better place. Tearing each other down gets us no where.

Products...here are my latest favs...Neutrogena Oil free Acne Wash (pink Grapefruit facial cleanser) OMG not sure whether to wash with it or drink it...smells amazing and it seems to be keeping those annoying little over 40 something breakouts at bay...pimples and wrinkles are so not fun...just a fact of life for us 40 somethings...

Garnier Skin Renew Anti Sun Damage - this promises to take care of sun damage and age spots. Will keep you posted. Love how it makes my skin look and feel and it has spf 28. Will let ya know next month how the age spots are fading.
As for the best EVER sunscreen that also keeps the shine away - Colore Science Sunforgettable SPF 30 Sun Protection is AWESOME. Best of all it is a powder. Use your regular products and then this and it will cut the shine and give you sunscreen protection too.

Hair - BioSilk - shampoo, conditioner and Therapy...Allure magazing rated it number one. It is great. Found a really good deal at Target. All three 12oz. products for 26.00 - crazy!! Just the Therapy 12 oz. was 41.00 at most retailers. Run to TARGET!! My hair looks and feels thicker and it is lasting for days...I liked the Morracan Oil products but had to wash my hair more frequently. If you are washing yours everyday - STOP!!! Or at least don't blow dry it everyday. Very damaging to your hair.

Food. Baby girl is rocking this at home - Pillsbury Cresent Rolls and Tollhouse Chocolate chips...just wrap them up together and bake and OMG...so simple so good!!Not bikini friendly but who cares!!

Hobby Lobby...love that store!! If it is not on sale - wait a week and it will be!

Facebook...connecting with old friends is always a good thing!!! Cousins even better.

Puppies. Are truly a blessing when you have to say good by to the BEST GIRL DOG EVER...R.I.P. our sweet Lucy girl. Pets are more than just a part of the family. They are the glue that keeps us all together. If you don't have one for any reason...think about it again. Just do it. Your family will be closer for it. Can't explain it just know it. Trust me on this one - unconditional love is what the Good Stuff is all about.

Best Dream Ever!!!

Sometimes my best sleep happens after the alarm clock goes off....you know, when someone else needs to get up and you don't. That alone is awesome but just getting to lay there an extra hour is pure heaven. Having a really fantastic dream too is just better than birthday cake. That happened to me this week. Now I know you are all just dying to know what and who I dreamed about. This will also be a test to see if Wonderman is reading my blog. I've been feeling a little ignored here lately. Pretty sure he is not keeping up.

Back to dream world. As usual George was there. I am convinced he is refusing to get married because I am already taken and he is just waiting patiently for that to change. Being the gentleman that he is and the lady I am we are just not available for each other at this time. Wonderman is breathing a sigh of relief (IF HE IS READING HIS WIFE'S BLOG!!!) I am sure George is reading - this is my dream world story afterall...so back to my dream. Well, George is being all Clooney on me and that is fab but here is the BEST part of my dream. As if GC isn't enough!!! I am a much younger and better version of myself too!! WHA HOOO!! We all know he likes his girlfriends slightly younger but still classy. AND in my dream I am rocking a smoking body in the wonderful age zone of nothing saggin or baggin!!! My hair is super long and full and fab!! I don't even need bangs (my version of botox - call mine bangtox) cause my forehead is still smooth...I am so excited about this all that poor George is feeling ignored. I swear - I can't stop looking at myself long enough to even think about him!! Now, that things have started to change in reality I can really appreciate the chance to enjoy a smoking hot body in my dream world. So I am not ashamed to admit that I was just not that into him right then...I was having way more fun in my dream world closet trying on all that cute stuff that I am too old to be wearing now in reality world. Needless, to say George was feeling a wee bit ignored and being the movie star that he is this is not a normal feeling for him. That was when the doorbell rang and guess who came strollin in??? Those two cute vampire brothers from my favorite TV show. This is also when the alarm clock went off again and POOF there went my smoking hot 30something body ...back to reality. You know you are really getting older when you are more excited about dreaming you are younger than dreaming about George...

I Don't Get It...

Okay, I know this sounds too easy...but seriously. I just blogged about what I know for sure so here are a few things well...I'm sorry - I just don't GET.

1. Jay Z. I do get he is successful. I do get he is married to Beyonce and we LOVE her. Therefore, we must love him. And I could - if he just wouldn't pick up a microphone and "sing/rap" live on SNL. Sorry, but I thought it was a skit about how bad rappers can be. Guess it wasn't. A SKIT - but it was SH*&. Sorry. Shoot me. Okay, didn't mean that literally MR. Z. Stick to "bidness deals" and leave the microphone to Miss B. All I'm saying. And, for the record I happen to love rap. Most of it anyway. As much as I can listen to without Gman in the car cause he just freaks if he hears his MOM singing along. And yes, I know the words and what most of them mean. Sorry but I like the beat and it is fun to dance to. As long as Mr. Z. isn't doing it live on SNL.

2. Larry King. Where do I even start? How about there is not enough money EVER that he or anyone could give me to even think about lying in a bed with no clothes on with THAT man. Much less having sex with him...seriously. And her sister too??? Whatev. I think both of them are mental. And he is just a really OLD man with a lot of money. Just not enough for me. EVER. Sad, but I could have at least respected them a little if the whole he slept with my sister thing had not happened. I mean the hot, cute, coach??? Come on!! Like that was a surprise?? Hello??? Larry King???? What are these people thinking???

3. Getting old...speaking of Mr. King - what are the odds that MOST men lose their hair at a certain age? And what are the odds that certain men never do??? LIKE men that sing rock and roll for a living? I'm sorry - I LOVE Bon Jovi and I've seen them live at least 2 or 3 times and I'd see them again in a heart beat. But, as I was watching them tonight on American Idol I couldn't help but stare in amazement at their hair. How lucky are they to still be performing and rockin and living the life and still have ALL that FREAKIN hair? I know it is "shorter" but, come on!!! Really??? I'm pretty sure the hairy guys on our soaps and tv shows are rockin some good fake hair and I just bet our rockers are too...by the way, I thought Daughtry was smokin hot with his bald head.

4. Before I watched this really funny video my sister in law sent me today I didn't really understand/get how men and women think differently. I don't mean think about issues I mean actually THINK differently - as in their brain works in different ways. And I'm even talking about the brain in the men's head that sits on their shoulders. We ALL get how the other one thinks differently (see Mr. King and the sister in #2.) Check out Mark Gunger on youtube - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GuMZ73mT5zM if that doesn't work try Mark Gunger Men's Brain Women's Brain Extended ...and if you've never tried Youtube...I DON'T GET THAT EITHER!!! GET WITH THE PROGRAM AND GET A LIFE ON FACEBOOK TOO WHILE YOU ARE AT IT!! Back to this hilarious video - men think in little boxes and their favorite box in their head is the nothing box. You see where this is going? Go check out the video!!

5. Last but not least - I don't get Twitter. I mean I know what it is in theory. Everybody blabs whatever is on their brain 24/7. For everyone to read. Like we care. Here's the part I don't get. Obviously, EVERYONE but me does care...and reads it all and twitters. I don't even really understand or know how or where you twit. Do you do it/twit on your computer or on your phone? And if phone do you need an app for it or a special phone? Sad. I know. But hey, I at least do FB and I BLOG so there.

6. I'm sure there is a lot more I don't get. I just don't remember it all right now. That is a wonderful thing about getting older and like most of us losing our hair and our memory. You can't miss what you don't remember...you just get older/just don't get it.

May Day May Day ALERT!!!

MAY DAY!!! Crap it is already May 2nd!!!! Only 15 days until I have to come up with something WONDERFUL for WONDERMAN'S birthday....WHY is it so hard to buy presents for guys??? Girls are so easy. JEWELRY, perfume, handbags, red soled shoes, you name it - we like it. But guys like cars. Cars cost lots of money and frankly, I just hate dealing with car salesmen. Even if I had gobs of money I'd hate going to buy a car. Guess I could do it online. But, since I don't have gobs of money I won't be buying a car so why am I still talking about it??? Cause, I am stalling and have no freakin clue (as usual) what I'm giving Wonderman for his birthday. He really liked the Victoria's Secret stuff I got him last year - heh heh...but it would be really lame and selfish on my part to do that again. Prolly, did it at Christmas too. Can't help it - shoot me for liking pretty underwear stuff. He wasn't complaining - trust me. And just to be clear here - HE was not the one wearing it either!!! So anyway, got to come up with something to wrap up for him.

His birthday also means that for the next two months we are the same age. He cannot call me his OLD WOMAN and I can't call him my boytoy....which also means that MY birthday is almost here and then I really will be an OLD WOMAN with her BOYTOY!!! Which reminds me it is time to start my Girly Girl Liquid diet....you will just have to check out one of my very first blogs on this site if you too want to lose a few pounds a really fun way. I always say it is okay to get a little bit older as long as I'm not getting a little bit fatter. I can do old but FAT makes me crazy....I pretend to embrace this whole "Love my junk in my trunk" mentality but the reality is FAT freaks me out. Now I'm not a big fan of tooo skinny either but wouldn't hurt most of us to lose about 5lbs. And right now - I'd be okay losing about 9.5lbs. - sounds better than 10. This is very hard to do with birthday season being upon us too....Wonderman is all about his birthday cake. He loves to request some really fancy made from scratch cake. His favorite is good ole fashion pound cake. Sounds simple but do not get me started on it. First of all, if it is made in a bundt pan THAT IS NOT FREAKIN POUND CAKE!!! Nothing wrong with Bundt cake - love it better than pound cake myself but it is his cake we are planning not mine. He likes the real southern kind like my neighbor B. Rush makes. HERS is soooo good. I would be soooo lucky if she had a burning desire to just whip up one of hers and if she would also drop it off sometime on or very near the 17th....Wow!! That would be awesome. Now, I asked and she gave me her recipe one year so I could make sure he got his favorite cake. But, frankly it is a pain to make it and mine truly did not taste as good as hers did. And if I'm going to all that trouble to make a cake from scratch it better have some CHOCOLATE in it by God!! HONESTLY - what is he thinking??? Boring. I'm thinking an ice cream cake sounds good. Ben & Jerry make yummy ones too. Crap now I'm thinking about cake and ice cream and I NEED to lose a few lbs. before July rolls around. Hard to lose lbs when SOMEONE wants a lb. cake!!! So now I've got two things to worry about for the next 15 days....on top of trying to lose some junk that is migrating from my trunk to my waist...or I could just go read another book!! Just finished Harlan Coben's newest - Caught - really liked it. Got more to read than time to read them in right now too! Also, don't miss the latest in the series that started True Blood - Charlaine Harris's Sookie Stackhouse books. If you haven't read them DO!!! I really love using Amazon Books to get the order right in series. Makes me CRAZY to read things out of order. And fyi...just noticed that if you are a Barnes & Noble member they have FREE shipping now on all books. Kind hard to beat that!!I really like the free app for my phone too that let's me buy and READ books right on my phone. So I'm off to read, shop and bake....

What Do I Know For Sure?

Love this question and I am borrowing it from Oprah...which makes sense if ya read the beginning of my blog. My original goal was to get lots of readers. Was hoping that IF Oprah ever called and said,"Girl, you are funny!!" I would say, "Why thank you!" And then she would fly me and any of my followers to her show. Trick was you had to sign up as a follower to go to Oprah. All I really wanted was to know who was reading....truth is - WE prolly ain't going to Oprah...she is about to hang it all up anyway. And ya'll are reading but not all are signed up. That's ok too. I hear ya. Now I still want to go to Oprah and Wonderman is working his connection...but it will prolly be just us and a hotel room in the Windy City and nothing wrong with THAT!! HA!! As for what I KNOW for sure....here we go.

1. There is only one perfect food - bacon. SHUT UP...I didn't say it was good for you. It is just perfect. Extra crispy to burned for me. Just did a lb. in the oven for book club tomorrow night. Making quickies/quiches with bacon and one with smoked ham and asparagus...Quick story - Book is fantastic...City of Thieves by David Benioff. Short version two guys have a reprieve from Nazis' firing squad in Russia if they can find a dozen eggs for Big WIG's daughter's wedding cake...now there are no freaking chickens alive within hundreds of miles much less a dozen eggs. Amazing story!!!Wouldn't mind if you stopped reading me right now and ran out and bought this book...you WILL NOT BE SORRY!! Anyway, lots of food with eggs for book club. That's why my house smells like bacon and I'm trying really, really hard NOT to eat it all right now. Relax, I am not stupid and I have a backup lb. just in case I do. Just like to do somethings ahead of time. So I KNOW FOR SURE - BACON IS MY PERFECT FOOD.

2. Life happens and you just have to roll with it. Normally, I am freakin out the night before ANY party of any kind at my house. I am great once the party starts - you just do NOT want to be here 24 hours prior. Ask my family. Now, after adding two adorable puppies to my posse - let me just say that I have a whole nuther attitude to par-tay giving. SHIT HAPPENS. A lot. That is just how puppies roll. They don't really care bout nuthing else. If they need to do it. They WILL DO IT. So hopefully, tomorrow night all will go smoothly. And if it doesn't - well that is what Dominoes is for and by the way - if you have not ordered the new improved Dominoes Pizza - shut up!! Perfect food and delivery #2!!! Key word there is DELIVERY!!!Fo Show!! You really have to try it....and order online cause it is so easy and the doorbell is ringing before you even log off!!

3. Puppies are really cute for a very good reason...none of them would ever survive if they weren't...or let me rephrase that... none of them would have homes if they weren't so freakin cute...They are a lot of work and none of it smells good. Except for little puppy breath and that is amazing. So are little puppy kisses and that little look they have when they KNOW FO SHOW they have done something wrong...love that little look. Really hate whatever it is that they have done and yes, it usually smells really bad. I like good smelling things. I really love for my house to smell good. Which is why I love my Orleans Candles. Creme Brulee. That's it - all I ever burn. Cause I Know For Sure this smells good to me. And I love my puppies. And don't forget the smell of little puppy feet. They smell good too - unless the little feets have stepped in the something they are giving you that cute little puppy look for.

4. And I know for sure...I can't sing. That really sucks for me. And you - if you are ever in my car and the radio is on. Cause I WILL be singing. I just won't sound very good. That is why I do not need an ipod. I'd be loving all my songs and singing along. WHILE I had on the little ear thingies and yes, YOU would be going, "OMG, somebody pull her plug and shut her up!" So, I know I can't sing and I know all that dancing they do on that tv show is a lot harder than it looks. And, yes the refrigerator/Kate needed to go home to her children. Cause, I can't sing and SHE can't DANCE. At all. PERIOD. NUFF SAID. WHITE MEN CAN'T JUMP AND THAT GIRL CAN'T DANCE. These very important things I know for sure. Oh, yea and one thing more. I am blessed.

How to Cure Puppy Fever

This is for all my friends that I have infected with Puppy Flu/Fever...that would be just about everyone that has seen and or held my TWO (yes, just shoot me now) new little bitty precious nonstop pee and poo machines. Or as my hubby likes to call them - Gerbil One and Gerbil Two. I'm off to the vet (again) today for round three of their shots and I'm really hoping they've gained an enormous amount of weight in two weeks and that the vet will recommend a severe diet. As in - if nothing goes in then maybe NOTHING WILL COME OUT!!! Sounds like a really good plan to me...I told you in another post about my new idea for an exercise video "Puppy Poo Squats" for anyone with puppies...everytime they poo/pee you SQUAT with good form while you pick it up and spray with cleaner. That should count for two squats. I think I am doing this at least 2500 times a day. Then again, I'm the dumbass that let my TEENAGE DAUGHTER TALK ME INTO BUYING TWO PUPPIES!!! If you have any brains at all - stop at one adorable little bitty pee/poo machine. That should be good for at least 1250 squats a day.

Did I also mention that my daughter is off at college right now and that this second poo machine is supposed to go off with her in the fall??? AFTER I do all the work/squats trying to potty train it??? Again - WTH was I thinking??? I'm telling you Puppy Flu is powerful and you need to innoculate yourself immediately. Just invision your house with pee and poo EVERYWHERE and that should do the trick. As for me, I am hanging in there. I still enjoy the cute little moments with the pups. God makes them really cute for a reason and yes, it is a trick. They are really cute when they are playing together in their playpen - their days of freely roaming the house are over. And they are even cuter when they are all cuddled up sleeping. They are really cute when they actually GO on the "potty pad". They are not so cute when they don't. And yes, they are silly cute when we dress them up in silly dog clothes. They are hilarious when we put their doggy diapers on them too. This really does help with the pee problem, not so much with the poo. TMI ya think?

Right after "WTH where you thinking?" the question I am asked the most is, "How are you going to let her take one of the pups to school in the fall?" Some days the answer is "ARE you kidding me - she can take BOTH of them to school in the fall!!" Even scarier was when she came home this weekend and actually got to spend more than 24 hours with them. (She had to leave the day after they first came home) Within 45 minutes and 325 squats her eyes were tearing up and their cuteness was wearing off. She actually had the nerve to say, "WOW, they are a lot of work!! And hyper too. I think I'll just take poor Max (one of our older dogs - yes, we have 4 total) up to my room to give him a break from the pups." Screw Max!! What about POOR MOMMY??? What about me??? I only wanted ONE puppy - WHY do I have TWO??? And OMG - am I gonna still have 4 in the fall??? Shoot me now!!

Even better, it seems next fall she and her roomates are planning to have their own pet store/apartment....Baby girl will have Gerbil Two and one roomate is planning to bring her dog from home (already housebroken) and her other roomate is planning on going to night school, working 9-5 and WAIT for it....buy her own NEW PUPPY!!! Somehow I'm thinking this is not a really good idea. Puppies are cute - but, OMG they are WORK people!!! Just don't tell Baby girl cause I really need her to take Gerbil Two to school...my thighs are killing me!! So again, if you feel Puppy Flu/Fever coming on think of your floors and thighs. And for God's sake - just get one!!!

TGIF

'Kay....now I know I brought this all on myself. Hate to whine when it is really my fault. Thank F&*^ it is Friday. Yes, it has kinda been that kinda day. Not all week. Just day. No real reason (cept maybe 4 dogs and pms week all in one...??? ya think) On paper this day should have been fabulous. Sunny and breezy but beautiful compared to the total tennis f&*) that yesterday was when of course we had a match that mattered. Guess who didn't win??? Bingo...not that I let that bother me cause that would be silly and a waste of all the blessings I do have. Mad tennis skills in gale force winds are just not one of them. EVIDENTLY. Onward. Today is after all Friday and since Thursday is my very favorite tv night ever - although Wed. is a very close second due to Modern Family and Cougar Town - I am usually in a fantastic mood just because of Thursday night tv alone. Yes, it doesn't take a lot to make me happy!! Today is really easy - hubby coming home (YEA!!!) - lunch for a girlfriend turning 50 but not looking it!! AND not me turning 50 - even better!!! Then house and dog stuff....ya know basic quick pick up and fluff and because of Puppy Flu I now have two puppies that I have to pretend to housetrain. Pretend is key word cause THEY are having none of that....it is waay more fun to just pee and poo whenever and wherever the mood stikes. Pollyanna that I am - I am just pretending this is all okay and that I am actually working out as I SQUAT and pick up and spray with cleaner all their good intentions. And wine is very important at the end of the day. THIS is work people!!

Anyway, for some unknown reason I was a touch cranky today....so when my best girls called and said "Happy Hour??" I said, " Hells, yes!!" That my friend is the beauty of crate training your puppies!! Even when they are the cutest things that ever walked the earth at the end of a day of nonstop pee and poo - time in the crate is truly a beautiful thing. So to all those negative Nellies that say "OMG, puppies are worse than babies!! What are you thinking???!!" I say, "I'm pretty freakin sure it is illegal to stick a BABY in a crate but there are books out there saying it is BEST to put your puppies in one!!" So there. Then again babies wear diapers and don't pee and poo everywhere. And that my friend is where doggie diapers come into this story. IF you want a real chuckle just check out this website (trust me - even if you are allergic to animals you will get a kick out of this!!)Pantsfordogs.com - Not only do they make pants/diapers they make and have pictures of THONGS for dogs!!! Warning this is not for the faint of heart. It does sort of look like doggie porn. Not that I would KNOW anything about that - if it even does exist. Just saying...nevermind. Check it out for yourself. Speaking of which my little ANGELS have been running around doing God knows what God knows where. Good news is it is very, very little .....bad news is they do it alot....you do the math. Meanwhile, I think my thighs are actually getting firmer from all the puppie poo/pee squats I'm doing. I think I see a work out video in my future!!! Come on there have been a lot of crappy (pun intended) ones out there and somebody bought them!!

So ...at the end of my day - Happy Hour with some really amazing girlfriends is the perfect end to my week...followed by lots of puppy kisses, hubby kisses and the best Chinese food delivered to my door - Chopsticks Asian Cafe - Orange chicken and Imperial Shrimp - OMG that is soooo good!!If you are lucky enough to live in McKinney, call 972-542-6969 and have them deliver!! Tell them I said so!!

Latest Health Alert

Here is the latest flu alert...I've warned you about wine flu and tennis flu(see girlygirl.pnn.com)...both are extremely contagious and potent. However, this latest flu alert could be THE ONE. The one that could rapidly spread and infect us all. PUPPY FLU!!! Cute but deadly...VERY cute but not to be taken lightly!! People this is serious. Stop and listen - it could happen to you. IT HAPPENED TO ME AND NOW I HAVE FOUR FREAKIN DOGS!!! YES,,, FOUR DOGS!! Even scarier two are PUPPIES/POOP & PEE MACHINES with fur. Good news I am not totally stupid. They do not shed - but they poo and pee every ten minutes. Wherever they are AT THAT TIME. And usually NOT where you are desperately trying to train them to go.

Now that I have your attention and you are freakin and wanting to know how this happened to me and more important how to keep this from happening to you!! I KNOW!! I am now officially the crazy dog lady. Thank god, I'm married and it's puppies and not cats...that is a whole nuther problemo folks...one step away from stuff that you do not need stacked all over your house. Has it's own tv show called Horders...do not go there my friend. So back to me and my sweetest baby girls...puppy baby girls.

Yes, I was only looking for one puppy. I've even tried to wait until something horrible happened to the two wonderful dogs we already have. Lucky for us they are going to defy all odds and live to be 2000 in dogie years. And that is all good for us. I just want a little itty bitty dog before I DIE. So, shoot me for going ahead and falling for my friend Laura's Coton de Tulear puppy....This was when I got infected. All I did was show up for a Super Bowl pre party with some dip and chips. Next thing I know I am totally obsessed with her little dog named Bing. I know how cute is that. Bing Crosby is so proud. And I fell in love. Perfect dog ever. Under 10lbs. and doesn't shed and doesn't even smell. Sold.

But not so fast...this breed is rare and hard to find. Also in the very pricey range for dogs. Being the smart girl that I am I immediately told Wonderman that this was ALL I wanted for Valentines. Since this was in January and he had no freakin idea what he was going to give me for V- Day he thought this was a good idea and getting him off the hook and out of a jewelry store. Silly man...love him anyway. As I mentioned these pups can cost a whole lot and that is just getting them home. After weeks of searching and no luck/under 2000$ range (even I wouldn't pay that) I found someone that had a litter of pups. And they were waaaay under priced. Why? I don't really want to know. Cute and healthy and I'm good to go. So long story short. I asked Baby girl to come home from college and help me pick out my newest pup. Big mistake. She picked out hers and mine. And that is how I ended up with double the loving and trouble. Plan is in the fall Lacy will go off to college with Baby Girl and Layla will be all mine...we'll see how that goes.

Now the part you really want to know...how do you keep from getting Puppy Flu? Well, do NOT come to my house under any circumstances to see me or my sweet itty bitty girls. Once you do and see and hold them it is All OVER FOR YOU MY FRIEND!! All it takes is one minute and you too will be infected and next thing ya know you too are trolling the internet looking for your puppy fix. Looking at pictures on my iphone can be dangerous but not instantly infectious. But they are pretty dang cute and the seed can be planted. And once you actually see and hold them it is game over my friend. You officially have Puppy Flu!!

More fun ways to waste time....

As if this blog isn't enough of a time vacuum...OMG! Thanks to ya'll that keep telling me how funny I am - here I am again...wanting to please and trying to be funny. Some days the funny feels flat. Like a bad hair day. Why does that happen anyway??? WTF is a bad hair day? Well, duh, we know WHAT it is...I mean HOW does it happen??? We pretty much do the same frickin thing to our hair everyday. Some days it is all fluffy and shiny and you know you are rockin it. And then you do the exact dang thing and it looks like someone put NAIR in your shampoo bottle...I am pretty much all about routine...hair and makeup is quick and easy cause I do the same thing all the time. That is why it totally shocks me when the hair falls flat. Usually when it matters the most - as in I am going somewhere where someone else will see me. If I am staying home and Wonderman is out of town on VERY IMPORTANT BUSINESS...my hair is freakin fabulous. I should just call everyone I know and say,"Hey, I'm having an amazing hair day/night/30 minutes...hurry over and come see and ooh and ahhh...I've got wine. Really, it will be fun!" Bet you wish you were my BFF right now!! I am fun time...

Okay, I totally feel a ramble coming on...but the whole bad hair thing made me think about something else. This is important and I think all us white chicks need to pay attention to our black sistas...we all know our fannies are flatter and we are so freaked out about the size of them and that is sad....smaller is not always better and we need to learn to Love our curves and try to get some more junk in the trunk. That is old news. Thanks to J Lo and Beyonce we are learning to love the curves - and we should. There really is nothing sexy or healthy about a bag of bones. Now, the other thing the black girls know about is WIGS!!! We are getting there with hair extensions, but how freakin easy would it be if you are having a bad hair day to just slap a wig on!!! OMG it could be long or short or a totally different color. We really need to look into this. My new best friend in my head is Wendy Williams and her tv show is soooo much fun!! It keeps me on my treadmill when I am beyond ready to stop and go do something way more fun. She is dishy and fun and very proper and classy too. AND she knows how to rock some hair and curves!!! Not all natural but at our age a little help can go a long way. I'm just saying hats are great for hiding bad hair days but wigs could rock our world....

Now back to what I was really going to blog about today....Remember ramble is my middle name...time vacuum but fun - Words Free or Words With Friends - app for iphone. THANKS so much to my friends that thought I needed something besides Facebook, my blogs, tennis, books and monthly mags to keep me busy. Not to mention all my favorite tv shows -THANK You SWEET BABY JESUS - for Direct TV!!! NOOOOOOO, now I am playing this freakin FUN word game - sorta like scrabble but not so they don't get sued for copyright infringement...on my phone. I remember the good old days when I didn't even have a charger for my phone cause I left it in my car all the time and it prolly wasn't even on anyway. NOW I am not only carrying my phone around from room to freakin room all day I am constantly checking to see if it is my turn to play my next word...I honestly don't know why I am doing this cause I totally suck at it and all my frenemies are totally kicking my ass at this new FUN WAY TO WASTE MORE TIME I DONT' HAVE!!! So if you have an iphone you HAVE to get this app....I think I read somewhere that people that use their brains for word games have a better chance of not getting.......what's the word....dementia. And I also read that red wine is good for your heart or something healthy...so go boost the economy - buy more iphones, apps, wigs and red wine!!! And best of all - Words Free App is FREE!!!Loving that!!

New Flu Strain Alert....

I know the media is keeping us all updated on the latest health scares floating around. And every drugstore is pushing flu shots to keep us safe. I also warned you about Wine flu on my other blog - if you missed it check it out at girlygirl.pnn.com - Wine flu is a lot of fun to get but the recovery can be a real kick in the head. And not in a good way...now some people believe in tequila shots to help speed up the recovery from wine flu but you be the judge of that. Today, I have another warning for all my friends but especially those that play tennis. Tennis flu....

This particular strain of flu strikes the morning after a match where you and your whole team takes a spanking....This is not to be confused with wine flu - unless, there was some serious wine consumption involved in order to forget this demoralizing team loss...Tennis flu is diagnosed when for whatever reason your opponents manage to kick your ass on the courts...or make you seriously consider trying badminton as your new team sport. You could still wear all your cute tennis clothes and that little birdie can't hurt much if someone tries to take your head off with it. Now that I think about it...badminton is sounding better and better - but, this is prolly just the tennis flu delirium and fever talking. Which goes along with all the body aches and painful memories of all the points you'd like to play over and see the ball actually go where you had big plans for it.

I recommend that if you find yourself waking up with tennis flu that you stay home. Pray for a rainy day. Stay in your jammies. Resist the urge to spend a kajillion more dollars with your favorite pro on more lessons. The first kajillion is obviously not working so hot for ya...recover first then next week when you are ready to face your next opponent by all means throw your money at the pro, buy a new outfit cause the one you wore this week is cursed for all time now and by all means inoculate yourself before the match. Some teams find a really good warm up before can prevent a reoccurance of tennis flu. Some go with bloody marys. I'm thinking since we just warmed up this week and look what happened that maybe we should go with an order of bloody marys this coming week.

As for the recovery time at home in your jammies, I find I play much better while watching lots of tennis on tv. I am at my best on the sofa watching others play. This also happens when I am just sitting court side watching my friends play. I have no problems figuring out which shot to go for and why the opponents just won another point. So after any good tennis spanking you need to just chill and boost your confidence by watching. You will know you have recovered and are ready to PLAY when you can go to the bathroom without pain. I am talking about the pain in your fanny (from the spanking) and your screaming thighs. This is the real reason I recommend staying home. It is impossible to leave the house when you might need to "hover" somewhere. As in a public restroom...it is not a sure thing that you will be able to hover long enough while suffering from tennis flu. Since it seems to affect the whole backside area and can in extreme cases cause arm and shoulder pain and back spasms. In extreme cases of tennis flu I have even known and heard of people having to give up their tennis career in favor of golf. Which would be a really big waste of lots of cute tennis clothes. So, until next week's drills and match...stay home and sit on the sofa - sit on your own clean toilet until you can safely hover in a public restroom - and watch tennis on tv and drink lots of fluids. And don't forget to eat your veggies - that celery stalk is not in the Bloody Mary just for decoration!

I'm a mag hag

I'm always amazed when someone tells me they don't like to read. I think reading is more natural than breathing to me. I think about reading all the time. I love book stores. Could spend hours in them. The only problem is - besides spending all that money there - I at some point realize I want to be somewhere else reading these books and then the stress sets in. To buy or read...there is only so much time in 24 hours. I don't just stop at books. I love magazines. That is why I love the mail truck. I love the surprise (well, not really a surprise...if you have subscriptions to almost every mag known to woman odds are THERE will be a mag in the box....) of opening the door and inside underneath all the junk mail - hate that almost as much as the pesky unsolicited phone calls ...really do need to get rid of that land line...is a thick stack of magazines....that is a worth the trip down the driveway in pouring rain.

The wonderful thing about magazines is that whatever you are interested in - there is a mag for that!!You name it, go ahead and try one topic and I can almost promise you there is a mag for that. So even people that "don't like to read" have to have interests in something. Grab a mag and take 20 minutes to just expand your knowledge and drink a cup of green tea while you're at it. That is another one of my fav things - hot tea and my new electric tea pot that gets the water super hot super fast without that annoying whistle blaring sound...I have a real problem with loud noises. THANK god neither of my kids wanted to play volleyball. I even tried to get baby girl to try it around 5th grade when we realized she was going to get her father's height. Little did I realize it meant sitting in a gym with bells and buzzers going off every 4 minutes and that you would be stuck there in buzzer hell for hours and days and every weekend for freaking ever. I am awed by my girlfriends that devote all their reading time to sitting and doing that. They don't even get "Sorry, weather is too hot, too cold or raining/sleeting/snowing" breaks. That is the bad thing about we can play in any weather sports. Prolly why my kids like tennis, golf and lacrosse. Good old outdoor sports that usually need dry good weather conditions to play. Most of the time anyway...

Back to mags and more hot coffee so I can focus and not ramble. This whole blog started because I was reading the March issue of O Magazine. I've already mentioned I read a lot...and what I consistently love about Oprah's mag is the writing. Every month I find my moneys worth in just that alone. I haven't even finished reading it and I just had to stop and share with you how good this issue is. I was blown away by the article by Zoe Fitzgerald Carter who wrote about dealing with her mother's decision to end her life. Lisa Kogan never disappoints... I am always laughing and most of the time thinking did I just write that or read/say/feel that. Only wish I had just written it. She is great and a staff member and there every month. Getting it right every time. She also has a book coming out and I'll be watching for that on one of my trips to my heaven on earth/book store. By the way, if you can still get a copy of Jan. issue do not miss Paige William's article "My Bra's Too Tight". Again very funny but also so inspiring for women everywhere that wake up and realize they need to make some major changes in their life. Major or small making changes means we are growing and getting better. We all need to keep doing that. Try a magazine - I really think we are all readers, we just need to find what we like to read.

As for me, time to get back to O - lots more to read and lots more really fab things to dream about that most of us prolly can't afford. Keep checking back in and I'll keep sharing the Good Stuff you and I can!! And if you're wondering if I just sit around all day reading - of course not!! I'm on stand by right now waiting for Gman to let me know if I can go watch him play his first JV golf tournament...for some reason he was not sure when I dropped him off if MOMS were allowed to be there. I was even willing to caddy for him. Imagine that! Thank God he sent me home to wait. Did I mention that it was 34 degrees and play was delayed due to frost??? Why the H&%$ does anyone want to do anything outside when it is cold? And no I don't throw myself off mountains of snow with little razor blades strapped to my boots either. I prefer poolside vacays with cabana boys waiting on me hand and foot while I READ a big thick stack of mags and finish at least half the suitcase load of books I brought.

A Perfect Day

Let's make this easy and start at the beginning....okay, night of sleep - not great but at 48 yrs. old it was better than lately. Not Wonderman's fault cause he was out of town...just pesky little hot flashes waking me up every 45 minutes. Then about 7:ish..I started thinking about how good that coffee was going to taste so I got up, cracked the shutters and OMG!!!A freakin winter fairyland was in my own backyard!!!SNOW and I mean a lot of Freakin SNOW for TEXAS was all over everything. How cool is that to start your morning? Then I got online and found out the schools were still babysitting for the day and HELLO!! It got even better!!! Heh, heh, heh!! Drove Gman to high school bitchin the whole way while Mommie was doing Happy DANCE in my seat!! Then I remembered the house fairies/maids were coming and that kinda sucked the joy out for about as long as it took me to realize at the end of the pretty snowy day I was going to have an amazing CLEAN house - that someone else cleaned - so WOW!! How cool is that???

Morning kinda of dragged on as I got the house ready for someone else to come clean - and let me tell you that is WORK people....then I got the desperate, pitiful help me text from Gman begging me to spring him from boredom and high school babysitting...almost said no, but - I am fun mom after all so I said "Fine, 1:45 but no earlier." Plus that gave him time to take his quiz. And I needed to take him to get stuff for his lacrosse tournament this weekend.Then I found out hubby had landed during the snow storm and would be home for dinner....shift from macaroni to plan B. (Hope there was something that would defrost in the freezer - have you ever BEEN to the grocery store when it was actually snowing like freakin crazy??? And I'm not talking about the day before when the newsreporters are just gassin on about a possible storm...I'm talkin about snow everywhere already AND STILL COMING DOWN!!!Lucky for me Wonderman had gotten some free (I KNOW) chicken from Market Street this week and I thought - duh, slap something together with that and wha la...beats macaroni...Let me just say. Slap something - shit nothing...that was an amazing dinner. I think I could have put Gman's plate in the cabinet without water cause he licked it clean and said - I quote - "OMG MOM YOU HAVE TO MAKE THIS AGAIN!!! - Score MOM!!!

Now, while this amazing feast was cooking I was cooking and watching my taped shows like: Cougar Town, which I hated the first week but, OMG LOVE it now....hate to be wrong but this show is so freakin funny now!!! LOVE it and I apologize to Ms. Cox for trashing the first week...still think it was weak but awesome now... then I watched the cutest thing ever on tv and that would be White Collar!!There is just nothing hotter than the prettiest man on the planet that would not in a million years want to have sex with me!! Weird - no, cause I am happily married to a Wonder(ful)man that would not like for me to be crushing on another super hot man - unless, there was NO CHANCE IN HELL THIS MAN WOULD BE INTERESTED IN ME...WINK WINK! And that too is okay!! THis man is so beautiful and NOT interested in me that the whole threesome thing takes on a whole nother meaning...;)Lookout Wonderman..all I'm saying is I LOVE this show...

And speakin of shows it just gets better and makes my perfect DAY cause at the end I get to watch Vampire Diaries!!! WHO HOOOOO...THURSDAYS ROCK!! Specially, every other when the house fairies come and every week when dinner rocks and Vampire Diaries is on!!Did I mention that I need to go pack now cause Hubby is taking me to Pebble Beach tomorrow to watch celebrities and pros play golf for the weekend...????? Perfect Day - I think so!!!

WTH Happened to January???

I am really starting to feel like Rip Van Wrinkle (ha ha, I know the right name!!)... I was JUST enjoying all my crazy Christmas crap - which reminds me of something else, I LOVE funny cocktail napkins. Swoozies is like crack to me...OMG somebody needs to keep me out of that store. I could spend hours and waaay too much money (sorry WM) on funny napkins. Lucky for me two of my favorites were gifts from two of my fav girlfriends. One said,"Here's to PEACE and Joy and Lots of FAKE sparkly CRAP" I just loved that one at Christmas...might use that in my Christmas card next year!! And the one I have out now says,"Let's eat DRINK and pray our butts fit in our VELVET PANTS"...and after all the crap we ate over Christmas it is just perfect! Course any dumbass with a big ass knows NOT to be caught dead in velvet pants. But, the napkin makes me smile and that's what it's all about.

Back to the fact that it is January 30!!! I just recovered from Christmas let down/take down and January is gone...but that's okay, cause Feb.2 is a BIG DAY!!! I can't wait...it all starts with the Oscar nominations - one of my bucket list items is to one year just be there in LA LA land for the Oscars. Note I said JUST be in LA...not on stage thanking God and Everyone I ever Knew for my little man statue...that would be beyond exciting and hell on earth for me at the same time. Ya'll know if you have been reading since the beginning of this blog that I used to joke about going to Oprah one day...truth is I'd much rather be in the audience than on her sofa...plus the audience usually gets good crap. Wonder if the guests do too??? Just want to be clear on that wish...there is good - center stage not so much. You can imagine if I'm this excited about the nominations how crazy I get watching the actual show and all the fun red carpet shows before!!! HEAVEN. And the beauty of Direct TV has enhanced my life in so many ways...love watching delayed so you can fastforward thru the boring speeches. Unless the person boring me to tears is hot then ya just mute it and look at them.

Also, on this big day several new books are coming out so a trip to my favorite place on the planet is on the schedule too...the bookstore or anyplace that has books for sale - TARGET rocks people!! What is not to love except for the gianormous amount of money I keep pumping into that place...BOOKS, music, really cute clothes, home stuff, food & wine (one less stop to shop) and OMG the Jewelry!!! If you have been skipping the accessory section you are missing out...GREAT stuff. I get more compliments on my Target jewelry than all my real stuff. Even Wonderman is happy cause I told him several years ago to save his money at the jewelry store and just support my little Target habit...he prolly spent less back in the day when he was coming home with little boxes - shhh, hope he's not reading this one.... He's been to Target too so he understands - might not like my costly little habit - but he's been bitten by the Target Bug too.

Hopefully, a movie I missed is coming out on DVD on 2/2 - love it when that happens and I can't wait for Zombieland - very sad I missed it in theatres but will rush to buy it. Kids loved it and will watch over and over and over...need to go see Avatar - mainly cause it is winning awards and makin a boat load of money. Personally, watching a bunch of blue people does not appeal to me. Hope it proves me wrong. I'm just finally getting used to all the orange people. And they are everywhere and I finally quit worrying that my tv was going out when I realizied that was just the spray tan craze. All my vampires are a nice shade of white so I know the tv is okay. Now, I'm terrified of skin cancer so I get the message that tanning is bad for us. But, just not digging the orange skin either. Couple of weeks ago we had a sunny day and tennis called and I got dressed and almost passed out when I saw my white (skinnier and somewhat toned - thanks Reebox ReTone shoes!!)legs....OMG. Nothing worse. Except very white tummies. Soooo, I dug out a bottle of Jergens Natural Glow Express - medium to tan skintones - it was awesome!! Instantly better and not too orange, still smells and that is a major prob for me cause I am all about SMELLING good. However, smelly won over whiter than white legs. Then before I could get my newly tanned legs on the tennis court the Texas Temperature dropped 20 degrees and it didn't matter afterall cause I got to put my tights on!! Nothing hides lumps and bumps AND white legs better than good running tights. Wish someone would invent a fleshtone pair you could wear year round...that's my new mission!!Gonna bring back "panty hose"...makes me cringe just to say "panty hose" - NASTY...will have to rename my new invention too...so much to do and so little time!!! I've been rambling on so much today it's prolly already Feb!!!

Beauty Sale Alert

I'm interrupting my own pajama day/read a good book time to bring you this info...forgot to earlier when I was on redoing my blog colors...speaking of colors and this ALERT rush to CVS today!!! Hope this sale is still on for you too...Revlon buy one get one FREE!!! Love that - now I do need to add I'm not sure if all products are included but the ones I got yesterday are and I love them!!!

Revlon AGE Defying (GOT to love that!!!Cause you know we are all defying and denying the fact that we are getting older. Not saying we aren't having birthdays -cause that with any luck means presents - just that we are getting older looking)Spa Face Illuminator - Okay, who did I lose on that one? Take out the stuff in the () and you will have the name of the product. Now if you are trying to find your youthful glow again and you would like for it to come out of a bottle or tube then this is for you!!! AND it has an SPF of 18 - bonus!! Now I used the 030 Gold Light today and it looks great(not braggin, talking bout the product folks...pretty is as pretty does and braggin is never pretty. Mamma raised me right) Goes on a little oompa loompa at first but don't panic is settles down to normal in a minute. If you are worried about what color you need -stop - that is the beauty of buy one get one free!!! Get the two closest to what you think. Hopefully, one works. If not, blend them. And you'll have light one for winter and dark one for summer when you accidentally get a little help from the sun. Don't forget to check it out in a mirror with nothing but outdoor light. Very important - please don't make me tell you it's not a good match. Also, the lighter one is good for under the eyes.

I also love my new eye shadows -polished bronze and brushed copper - great on all eye colors. I know the mags say "older" eyes shouldn't use too much frost or glitter but these are subtle and a little of that keeps it on our old crepe eyes which is what they really mean but don't want to say and lose a subscriber...

And remember - if you hurry and have a CVS card - two for one is a great time to try something new. And there may even be a coupon around that will make it even better. Yes, I love a good deal. But I love good products even better.

Now you all know I love Latisse - for lashes and brows - and I love, love, love Maybelline's NEW Stiletto Voluptuous Mascara...thick and long and who doesn't love that ;) ??? Mascara!! Hello!!! But, I have to call Bulls*&^ on their tv ad campaign. First of all - those eyelashes are freaky. I love long and thick but not only are these OBVIOUSLY not real they don't even look good. Sometimes bigger really isn't better. Wait - we are still talking about mascara right? Yes. So to the folks at Maybelline here is what I think. Stop that silly ad you paid waaay too much money to some ad genius for and just use a real person that uses your mascara and likes it a lot...I'm available and prolly cheaper too. Ya'll let me know if you like this mascara. I know Melinda does!! Heyyy!

So go beautify yourselves...nothing wrong with that. Just don't go all Heidi on me!!OMG. Is she for real??? Well, obviously not any more, but I'm talking about what is or isn't in her head. WTH is this poor lost soul thinking? I feel the most sorry for her poor mother. Babygirl, just go ahead and stab me in the heart if you ever EVER EVER...go on national tv airing all your crazy. Not that you have any crazy. Just if you ever do - think of your poor mama first and don't DO IT!! Instead of spending all that money (and boy, I really hoped she had to PAY for it) on the outside she should have found a really good shrink and worked on the inside. I know I said on my other blog I wasn't going to talk about her anymore but sometimes we learn the most from other people's mistakes...and whew, isn't that a lot more fun than when we make'em??

So back to jammie day and my good book and all my taped shows...by the way, I'm reading Beautiful Creatures - odd but no, it has nothing to do with today's topic!!!- I really like it, have no idea what is going on yet or where it's going and it's a good thing. Not that I'm stupid!! Just that it is so unusual and different and well done. You kinda think ya know but the suspense is really good so far. Will let ya know - now let me go read!!! :)

2010 Stuff I Love

Wow, time - TIME is flying by so fast. Every day, every minute. It truly just takes my breathe away. What matters, what do you care about, what should I blog about??? It is truly overwhelming and with all that is going on in the world - I do have to stop and ask .... what the f am I doing??? I cannot solve the problems in Haiti right now. My donations are welcome - but really??? The logistics of making them MATTER are overwhelming. True. Shut up. Just send some money people... that is truly what they need to help get people on the ground. Pretty sure I'm not going, so I will do a little and send some money. You can too. Doesn't have to be a lot. 10 bucks. Now - on to the other stuff...

Just devoured the Golden Globes...call me shallow. YES, I love every minute of this award show....who is sitting where and who are they talking too...waaay more fun than who is on stage!!! Even though the host tonight was hilarious!!! I admit my Direct tv account is worked overtime... tape everything I can. LOVE Blockbuster online...I can never EVER get anything back when it is due...this service is amazing!!! They send you stuff in the mail and you can keep it for fin'g ever!!! I'm in heaven...I've had the second season of ARMY WIVES for about six weeks. THEY don't care!! LOve that. Love the show...just been a little busy with life and Christmas...Christmas is big at my house. Takes me awhile to put it up, enjoy, and take it down. Don't mess with Mama...decortating mode is not pretty. House all done is. And to all those sweet friends that thought I paid someone to do it - I LOVE you!! What a compliment!!!

So 2010 - the things I love and I think you will too!!! I'm going to start with just the products. Simple and you can decide and go buy what matters to you...

1. Fit Flops or Reebox Easy tone shoes - if your feet aren't happy - YOU aren't happy!! If they actually tone anything too - well that is just a big freakin bonus!! These shoes feel so good you really won't care about the other stuff. And, yes, I think they do work...you try and decide.

2. Latisse - yes!! Your eyelashes and eyebrows will grow...promise. Then try Maybelline Stiletto Voluptious Mascara!!! Best ever!!! LONG and FULL...don't forget Latisse. Worth every Penny!!!

3. Once you get eyebrows ( or if you don't and you just want them ) use Anastasia's Brow Pen to fill them in...I love the Universal Deep Shade. Thanks to Latisse I have eyebrows but they are still blonde. LIKE my NATURAL haircolor that needs L'oreal thank you very much to stay blonde.

4. From across the POND are several products - This one is available at Target - No. 7 Protect and Perfect Intense Beauty Serum --- lots of words in that one. Kept reading about it all over the place and yes, it is a cult item...finally, bought it, used it and yes, now I'm telling you - try it. I Really like it. MY skin seems smoother and better and brighter after using it. Remember - no one is paying me to say this... just my opinion...It's in the Boots line of products at Target..

5. Rimmel - another British line...everywhere - drugstores - the new polish French Manicure Pro line is great!!! Stays on and lasts - really like it.Eye colors in Lynx are really pretty for all color eyes - my hint is to always use the darkest color of the set CLOSEST to you your eyelashes....darkest color on the lids and lightest color at your brows....makes YOUR eyecolor pop. Everytime. And that is what you want - people to notice your eye color not your eye shadow....

6. Urban*Decay eyeliner - 24/7 my two favorite colors are Underground and gunmetal - if you are over 30...do not let the bright colors and all freak you out...These eyeliners last forever and are worth the money. Go to Sephora...be proud and stand tall and buy them...Check out girl told me the eye shadows were amazing too... haven't tried them yet but will let ya know.

7. Covergirl Olay simply ageless line - concealer and foundation - LOVE Ellen - so proud of CG for using her in their advertising - if you like her show you will love her books - watch and go buy and support smart, funny women everywhere!!!And this makeup is really good too!! The trick to all foundation is just put it where you need it....pat it on. Do not spread it like it's icing on a cake. That looks fake. Just where you need it. And just pat it on...

8. For just a little bit of color - but soooo important - bare minerals - rose radiance is the most amazing and natural blush ever....little bit will make your eyes pop and yours cheeks can lift up your whole face.

9. Last but not least - just remember this is all just paint on an old barn. And all barns look better with a little paint. All faces look better with a big ole smile... A really big smile that makes your eyes crinkle up - a smile that shows you really feel it. Really feel and enjoy life - every minute and every day... it is all flying by so fast...

Finally - what do I love....it's simple really. I love knowing that something I said or wrote matters to you. Because YOU are important. I could be writing to myself in a HIDDEN diary right now - but I'm not. I'm bloggin online and asking my friends and loved ones to read this. So, I really like it when you tell me something I wrote about made you laugh, made you smile or made your life better. I love really sweet friends that give me beautiful elf shoe wine glasses because she missed my girl party, girlfriends that call me to play tennis cause we found out at the last minute we are challenging in for another level - WTF?? - Amazing friends that introduce me to the sweetest dogs on the planet that I now just have to have ...and I'm thankful for my amazing daughter who shows me that she is smart and strong and able to take care of herself. I am proud of her little brother that is following in her footsteps and is willing and able to take care of all of us...and to Wonderman...who patiently waits while I spend extra hours just blogging about stuff...I am so thankful.