Thursday, February 17, 2011

Stupid Cupid

Now that you are confused and I have your attention....of course, I don't think Cupid is Stupid. I want (and expect) my flowers, candy, cards and sparklies just like YOU do...some years are better than others...LOVED this year. If you are one of my two offspring now would be a really good time for you to go look at porn or something else on the internet. This will totally gross you out. (Of course, now they are glued but they have been warned...)

Times are tight for all of us. Sad to say and trust me - I don't say it often but Hubs is off the hook - thru the years he has wowed me and spoiled me and it pains me to say it but - I really do have it all. Okay, like maybe ONE of each. There is only so much joolree (jewelry for those that are new to blog - like to mispell to give it humor) a girl can wear, EVEN in Texas without looking crazy. Don't worry - Gypsy is still my middle name but he has covered that department and I love him up for it. He has also rocked my world in the shoe and handbag department. Thanks to my devotion to Sex and City - the show uncut on tv please! - he (bless his little man heart) went on Ebay years ago and bought me a fantastic pair of Manolos...yes, they are real. He was thrilled to realize that shoes and handbags are crazy expensive but still less than the sparklie things. Thanks to a really good job in the 90's he pretty much covered the joolry. Fastforward to moving to Dallas and my first Louis. My first Louis baby was an anniversary gift while we were in New York. Smart man had it shipped home to avoid tax. Hope that was legal - whoops. Second one got him out of a major birthday jam when he had no idea what to get me. Love them both. Third one was our oops baby. Adopted over the internet from China and unintentionally prolly not real. Freakin cute and really good deal and hardly ever leaves the house cause we are not down with fake crap.

I know I said one of each - but Hubs totally gets you can rock clothes from Target and Kohls as long as you don't skimp on the shoes and handbags. So, I have a few really awesome bags. And only one pair of the most coveted red sole shoes in the world. Best day ever - hubs says cancel your girlfriend plans. I'm taking you shopping for a pair of red soled shoes and then lunch at the Mansion on Turtle Creek. It was a close call, but hells yes! I blew off my girlfriends so fast you could see the smoke. It was our 20 something anniversary, so I played that card and they still love me. Crazy bitches - think I am actually going to let them borrow my shoes.

So at this point in our life - Christmas, Valentines, Anniversary and birthdays roll around and I'm like whatever. Got all I need. Just don't forget it totally and as long as I can buy books and mags I'm a happy girl. This is where the offspring really do need to go do something else - WARNING!!! YOUR PARENTS STILL HAVE SEX. NOT AS MUCH BUT STILL....MORE THAN TWICE. Feb. 14th rolls around again. I make the promise of not this morning but you hurry home and I'm going to rock your world. (Hey, sometimes they fall for it...feed them big dinner w/ wine and it's not your fault if they fall asleep)I've already got a great card (even though he thinks they are a huge waste of money) and stuff for boy offspring. Baby girl got a great giftbag of all her fav things this weekend when we were lucky enough to be see her while boy offspring had a lacrosse tournament where she is in college. How cool is that?? As we are leaving after fantastic weekend with her and lacrosse the Hubs makes the super cool Dad move and gives her the most BEAUTIFUL dozen roses you have ever seen...yippee for her and she is thrilled.

Vday rolls around. Boy offspring totally blows off and ignores all the darling girls that text him like crazy. I make the big promise to the hubs that big things are going to happen when he gets home and future lax star is at practice. Fast forward to end of day...I've gone to store and have all that is needed for fantastic steak dinner. After 4 major snow storms and no grill action we are thrilled to grill at home. Hubs calls to ask if I need anything from store...answer is no got it all and hurry home ;;;))) He comes on in .... a hurry to change and go for a run. As he is changing and we are catching up on the day - I realize he is empty handed and he realizes that it is Vday and while I didn't need dinner from store he was SUPPOSED to stop and pick up MY flowers....not only am I not getting crazy no kids home sex - I AM NOT EVEN GETTING FLOWERS. On Valentine's Day. No flowers. No card. No candy. Cupid IS stupid.

But, he was fast on his feet(going running afterall) straight to the grocery store!!! Made it home with the most amazingly beautiful dozen roses you have ever seen...and he even tried to listen when I said no candy...six chocolate covered strawberries instead. They were awesome!!

Dinner was fantastic. Flowers were beautiful. Boy offspring survived lax practice and wrath of cute girls. Girlfriend enjoyed first Vday without boyfriend in four years. And as for us, well I'll just close with My Cupid is not Stupid.

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